We arrived mid-day and found a lovely spot. After a much-needed project in the van, I decided to test it out by getting the bikes out of the back. We needed to go for a ride. The wind grabbed the back door and swung it around, smashing it into a picnic table. When I saw the dent I slammed the door shut and cussed my way back to the front. I jumped inside and Mo wondered what was the matter.
“I killed our baby”
The horror flushed over me, our brand new van, big dent, all my fault. I started the van and we pulled out of there. We needed a change of scenery.
We found a nice spot that in hindsight was better than the first. Better yet it was out of the wind.
The day got late and the depression increased. Mo knew I needed to get outside and work it out. We went out to survey the damage.
“It’s not so bad”
I knew she was just trying to make me feel better. I started to walk. And walk. Made it to the end of the peninsula and into a frozen bay. It was the sunset that brought relief. As soon and instinct kicked in. To reach into my pocket to grab the camera. To document the beauty or uniqueness. To share. And to appreciate with Mo the sunset. And I forgot.
Maybe I took a step back to see the big picture. The killing of our baby became a speckle. The world was right again.