Hello from City Brew where I am feeling very alone in this western town that suddenly seems foreign to me. Today is hike day to recover from the weekend but where do I hike? Even more scary is the fact that I have not hiked alone in over 10 years. My hiking buddy has always filled the position of trail companion. Not only that and inspiring companion. We both wanted to be at the top of some mountain and we wanted to be there before the other. Without a buddy like that what is the point of even hiking at all?
Imagine the active and energetic friend in this photo, tongue white, lying limp, moments from death. Do you continue to try to help her continue to breath? Even though you don’t know what to do (maybe I could of opened her up and drained her lungs???). Or do you just hold her and look into her eyes so she will have companionship as she dies? I hope I picked the latter in time for her to be with me and not alone on the side of Interstate 90 at exit 197. Marcy has been every stretch in every state from Boston to Idaho on I90 and at 11:30 I said goodbye to my hiking buddy.
So here I am in Missoula and hiking is not in my book of things I want to do any more. Besides every trail has memories that I just cant face. The only thing I do alone is biking so I guess that is what I will do. Really, I wonder what is the point of anything?
Time to run home to find my old copy of Sim City. I know I can get lost in that game and don’t even need the outdoors. Time to leave behind reality and exist in fantasy. Who wants to be out there any way, its raining!
Thank you all for your thoughts. What is everyone doing today?