My coworker catches a glimpse of a scene so chaotic, they’re halfway through dialing 911 before they realize—hold up, it’s just Bill having another one of his “Survival Mondays.”
At first, the scene’s a mess—looks like a garage sale after a tornado. But then it hits me: this isn’t the aftermath of some catastrophic crash. Nope, it’s just Bill Martin doing his best impression of a bear hibernating through winter—or, in his case, the horrors of Monday.
It’s like someone slapped a grunge filter over everything, giving it that “I’ve seen some things, man” vibe, which is peak Bill. Far from being a disaster zone, it turns out to be the cozy, albeit chaotic, interior of his trusty campervan. It’s his little fortress of solitude, shielding him from the Monday mayhem outside.
Peeking through the clutter, I can almost picture Bill in there, probably catching Zs to sidestep any unnecessary Monday drama. His game plan? Fly under the radar, keep it down, and let Monday sort itself out while he’s off the grid. Come Wednesday, the storm’s blown over, and Bill can emerge from his cocoon, rejuvenated and ready to tackle the rest of the week with gusto. It’s a quirky strategy for sure, but hey, Bill’s practically a Zen master of dodging Monday madness at this point.
“I don’t know, I am spitting up blood and have asthma …”
— Rebecca Rush 2014
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