I am 55: 2 Weeks of Psychological Warfare

Birthday cheers to me! These last couple of weeks have felt like we’ve been moonlighting as characters in a Kafka novel, playing phone tag with State Farm, engaging in a bizarre dance with lawyers, and trying to decode the mystical language of appraisers, all while not moving an inch closer to sorting anything out. It’s been a rollercoaster of hope, exasperation, and mastering the art of repeating ourselves to an agent who might as well be a brick wall. As we extinguish the candles, our wish is simple yet seems as elusive as a decent Wi-Fi signal in the countryside: a straight answer from someone, anyone, at State Farm. Meanwhile, we’ll polish our customer service charm and maybe, just maybe, get ourselves a stress ball or a punching bag. Fingers crossed that next year’s theme is less “eternal hold music” and more “endless beach vibes!”